Sunday, December 18, 2016

Advent 4 – LOVE
Sunday, December 18, 2016
Psalm 80

Restore us, O God of hosts; show us the light of your countenance, and we shall be saved.

Psalm 80: 18

It’s so dark here, in the place I always find myself. I find myself in the dark, wondering, where did you go, God?

Where is the light?

Why here? Why after I’ve been trying so hard to do it all, to show and know it all. Why here, after all my struggles, am I stuck in the same place?

I have, somehow, in the beholding of your Grace, turned myself around, trying to nestle in. I wanted to curl into the warmth, and to just coast. Just not to have to. Anything.

And now it is dark. I have traded the old comfort for the light. Where is the light?

Show me the light of your countenance…

In an effort to be comfortable, I turned and lost the light. In the dark of my shadow I wallow and rage.

It is my turning that has separated me.

It is both my doing and my not doing, where I get lost.

You, O Son, have not moved. If I am listening, still like a ready cat, I can feel the warmth on my back.

And I can turn to the light again. And recover myself.

It has never moved.

Help me to remember that it is me who turns and You who are the sphere I am within.

Restore us, O God of hosts; show us the light of your countenance, and we shall be saved.

– Maggie Grace Moore